Choosing Last: How to live it

I loved the book "Overturning Tables" and how it give application to the church and missions (Read that here). But I also wanted to do my own study and application about how Jesus lived "Overturning Tables" (my day-to-day insights are here).

It started at the Justice Conference in 2017. Christena Cleveland spoke about how she started studying every single encounter Jesus had with people, and what it meant to the power system, to the poor, to the weak.
She wanted a theology on how Christ came to earth not to bring equality, but equity. How he didn’t create a round table, he flipped the tables. How first become last, and last become first and what the significance of that is for our lives today.
I was inspired: I wanted that too. I began a chronological study through the Gospels, each day asking, “What does Jesus teach me about being last?” I divided it up into 40+ readings, so I could do it for Lent and Advent. But since I was also pregnant/having a second child, the study ended up taking me about a year.

From this study,  I learned these 10 things about Christ. He took deliberate steps to consistently and intentionally choose last:
1. He came to earth
2. He came to earth poor
3. He came to earth poor and illegitimate
4. He came to earth poor and illegitimate and waited 30 years to anything of consequence
5. He came to earth poor and illegitimate and waited 30 years and then choose poor friends/disciples
6. He came to earth poor and illegitimate and waited 30 years, choose poor friends, and then told people NOT to tell about the miracles he did
7. He came to earth poor and illegitimate, waited 30 years, choose poor friends, told people not to tell what he did, and worked hard to keep a low profile by moving around and staying mostly out of big cities/main places
8. He came to earth poor and illegitimate, waited 30 years, choose poor friends, told people not to tell what he did, stayed out of the limelight on purpose, and preached/taught the main central message to serve others and be humble
9. He came to earth poor and illegitimate, waited 30 years, choose poor friends, told people not to tell what he did, stayed out of the limelight on purpose, preached/lived servanthood and humility, and constantly elevated and included the weak/poor/woman/sick in his actions and words
10. He did all this, and told us to do as he did (Christian = little Christ)

Jesus put himself last because he put God (the Father) first. How can I deliberately and intentionally put God first and choose last? I look for specific steps to do so in each of my roles (areas of life):
1. My role as a woman or man (physically and emotionally)
2. My role as a princess or prince (a child of God spiritually)
3. My role as a friend (socially)
4. My role as a wife/mother (or other familial role)
5. My role as a ____(vocationally)

Personally, in my life, as a single missionary for 10 years, it was a lot of impressive (to me) and visible choosing last choices. I chose to work in the inner city, I choose to work in rural Brazil, I chose to live off of very bare basics. I did all kinds of things like living off of rice and beans for a month, using only a bicycle for a month, living with a family in a poor community for a month: anything I could think of to better understand and serve those that God had called me to. I actively choose to do without things so I could give the money to someone who had much less than I did.
I found a lot of fulfillment from these choices. In a way, choosing last was part of how I defined myself. To me, that is what it meant to be a missionary, to be a Christian, to be a social justice warrior.
But now, as a married mom, I am in a different phase of life. It is much more about unimpressive and invisible choosing last. I feel that I have had to adjust to my “choosing last” to becoming much more personal, and effecting me in a much more holistic way (meaning, it touches every single role that I have). I choose to respond graciously to my sick daughter who is up all night—I choose to put my sleep needs last. I choose to let my husband have some time with the guys while I stay home with the girls. Again. I choose to use my chatting time with a friend to listen to her hurts, rather than share my own.
It is important that we don’t value some kinds of choosing last over others: they are all important, and God sees the heart and the inner sacrifice, rather than outward impressiveness. God is calling all of us to choose last: not because we are good people, or can be humble in our own strength, but because we have chosen God to be first. That must be our true motivation for choosing last to really work.