Five Minutes of Fergie

Time is so ornery. Going slow when I want it to go fast. Never pray for patience. God answers by giving situations you have to have patience in. Waiting for him to get on the plane and come here. Sigh. 

“What all women want—is simply this: she wants to be chosen. Looked at logically, marriage is a terrible proposition for a woman. She has to risk her life to have a man’s children, she literally loses her name, as she takes her husband’s name, as do the kids. She makes a man a home and assumes, even in our egalitarian age, most of the domestic workload. Why would any sane person agree to so rotten a deal? Because a man can give a woman the one thing her parents cannot. Her parents can love her. But only he can choose her. He can make her feel special and unique. He knows she is worth choosing no matter what that means. Love is not enough. She must be chosen. Choose her. The complaining wife doesn’t really care that her husband watches too much TV, or plays too many video games, or works too long, it is that he does those things instead of choosing her. The man who will regularly demonstrate to his wife that she is his top choice will be the man with an extremely happy wife. She just needs you to exhibit, with regularity, that you intentionally choose her. “ --Laugh your way to a better Marriage

I am ready to be chosen.

“Successful marriages are ones that duke it out in order to establish the rules of the relationship and to set up meaningful, mutually respected boundaries. I do not believe couples should “share’ everything they feel in some foolish attempt at “honesty.” One of the reasons I am still married to the same woman after thirty-plus years is that I don’t share everything I think and feel, because sometimes what I think and feel is not very kind. “

Oh long distance communication! 

“We willingly do “good” up to a point. And what is that point? Our personal happiness. Am I saying God would ask someone to stick in a marriage that makes them unhappy? You can’t secure a happy marriage if you’re willing to discard an unhappy one. Happiness dawns only when we are willing to sacrifice our personal happiness to do what is right. You will either fight to make your marriage work, or you will just fight, period." --Laugh your way to a better Marriage