Sunday Funday May

Our weekly vlog:

We feel pretty settled in now (and hopefully done with the stomach flu). Sofia is doing well at all day preschool, and Jessica is getting used to being an only child during the day. She has started singing a lot--nothing understandable about it--but definitely singing, and it brings us all joy as we see her step a bit outside of her introverted self.
We are slowly getting ourselves back into things at Living Stones, school, church, and PPC (our partners at the trash dump) as well as finding a gym, starting a garden, and those kind of things. We are excited to restart the beloved Taco Tuesdays tomorrow, and get to know some new team members here in Brazil. I have enjoyed my first week of restricting social media (just on certain days), although mostly it has just freed me up to Pinterest house organizing things instead (perhaps I should make one Pinterest day a week?).

Reads from the Interwebs:
1. The Holy Post on Abortion: If you haven't heard the Holy Post Podcast, I recommend it (and I am just getting into podcasts), and if you've been wondering about abortion policies going around--please check this out--it was a blessing to me personally.
2. Singleness and the commitment to Community: I loved the "Single" theme at Velvet Ashes! As someone who loved and enjoyed her single years, I still connect and pass on when I see good things written about it. Finding my community while single in Brazil made all the difference, and it was truly a taste of heaven.
3. Hard Times? "Suffering is an invitation to stop pretending. Suffering in an invitation to stop avoiding. Suffering is an invitation to let go of control. Suffering is an invitation to pour out our hearts. Suffering is an invitation to lament to God."
4. Dear Single Girl: YES! As someone who was a single missionary for 10 years, and now a married one for 5, I have seen my marital status open doors I never imagined in ministry--but also close other ones I needed to grieve and let go of. Go live your calling, your passion, your joy!
5. The Bible Project: we've been enjoying watching these, and it was especially encouraging to me this weekend as I was pretty sick Saturday and Sunday.

The Holy Post on Abortion

I have been listening to the podcast called "The Holy Post" for a couple months, and have really enjoyed it--it has the guy from Veggie Tales, is witty, and covers current topics in a healthy way. Today I drove to Lagoa de Itaenga Living Stones (for the first time by myself) and was impressed enough by how they covered the abortion topic that I listened to it twice. I strongly suggest that you listen yourself to episode 352: Athleisure, Abortion, and Ancient Squirrels with Mike Nawrocki. I will summarize/quote the best parts about abortion (the bold parts are my thoughts):

"If you could reduce significantly the amount of abortions, without overturning Row v. Wade OR overturn Row v. Wade and have no change in the number of abortions--which would you pick? Abortion was not invented in 1973, it can't be undone with a court ruling."

What will undo abortions is people (the church) coming along side women before they ever get to an abortion clinic--and being there still after she leaves: no matter what choice she made inside.

"After the Civil War, reconstruction totally failed--why? Because at the end of the day, they (many Christian abolitionists) weren't against racism, they were just against slavery. My concern is that they (many Christian conservatives) will fight to overturn Row v. Wade and may succeed, just to end up seeing the abortion rate go up. Because at the end of the day, do they care about helping women who are pregnant, or just about getting evil legislation off the books?"

Are we just trying to get the government to do the work for us (on abortion), because it is easier than the actual hard work of relationships and adoption and loving hurting and broken people? 

"Around 25% of abortions are done by pill or injection (50% in Europe). All these women have to do is go online and buy this drug and induce an abortion. Women have always had ways of aborting unwanted pregnancies and will continue no matter what is overturned. As the church, if we believe in the sanctity of life and care about these women, then we need a holistic response, not just a political one."

With politics, I think it is important to remember that they (the government) aren't going to solve all the problems, no matter how much they end up voting like you wanted them to. God chose us Christians to be the agents of change, and He chose to work through the local church (like it or not). 

We need to find many different ways to reduce abortions, protect women, and protect babies. I am against abortion (just as I am against murder), and think it should not be done (just like murder), and should be illegal (just like murder). But, there are many other things that need to be done (over the counter cheap birth control, more male accountability, sex education...) before, during, and (perhaps?) after Row v. Wade.

Here are four other abortion/politics blogs from the past:
3 Things I learned from the Women's March on Washington
Never Ever
Stop Calling your Congressman and Start Making Relationships
Politics

In closing, I am posting from Seth Woods (I've never met him, it is a Facebook post that a friend posted, but I felt too intimidated to repost on Facebook because I am just not ready for that drama):

I need to talk to my conservative/Christian friends and family for a minute. About abortion.

First: if you hold the personal belief or conviction that abortion is wrong, is a sin, is against God's will... That is absolutely okay, and understandable. There are so many reasons to feel this way, not just from a theological/religious standpoint, but from personal experiences, hopes, desires, etc. Your belief about where you stand on the moral/ethical merits of abortion are yours to have, to cherish, to speak about, to share. They are your human rights and your constitutional rights in our country.

Second: America is not a Christian nation. It is not a nation for Christians. It is a nation for all. I know this can be genuinely hard to accept. I grew up in the church too. We are sold this idea of a Christian nation, one nation under God. That was never what we had. What we have is a nation founded on the idea of liberty and equality, with the men drafting the documents having the amazing foresight to make the language broader than their own beliefs about equality (which many of them felt only applied to white landowning men). Thank God! What they gave us was so much greater than their own biases. They gave us room to grow in our understanding of equality and freedom and mutual cooperation. And so all faiths are welcome here. And that is beautiful.

Third: Knowing and hopefully accepting that, we can recognize that there are large portions of our fellow Americans who are not Christian. Imagine a Jewish senator putting forth a bill that would require every male -infant, child, and adult - to be circumcised. Or a Muslim governor signing a bill into law that states all citizens must pray five times a day on their prayer mats. You would be very understandably (and as far as the constitution goes, rightly) upset over someone trying to legislate their beliefs onto your lives and bodies...

Four: Your politicians are using you. They are using your deeply held spiritual and emotional beliefs about abortion to justify racial, gender, and class inequality. The men pushing these laws are concerned with power, not with the unborn. There are documented cases of GOP "pro-life" politicians who are pushing legislation like this with one hand and with the other hand are encouraging their secret girlfriends to terminate their very secret and unwanted pregnancies. For you, this issue is about speaking up for what you believe. For many many of the politicians, it is about feeding their own personal agendas and increasing their power. YOU GIVE THEM THAT POWER. And they are grossly abusing it, not to the glory of God. Please stop letting them use you to control people.

Five: this is pretty core, and I'm not sure how to say it, so forgive me my ineloquence here. If you want to see a world without abortion, you need to work to create a world that doesn't need abortion. That world cannot be legislated into being. That was never the job of the church anyway - to legislate their way to the kingdom of god? Ugh. You may want to see a world that didn't drink alcohol - how did prohibition work out? No more drunks? No. You cannot legislate morality. You can work toward it though. I love that you love the unborn. I love that you have a heart that feels that. Please have a heart for those who are already born as well. Please be truly pro-life, and take care of women instead of criminalizing them. A world that didn't need abortions would be one where birth control was extremely affordable and available, where young people everywhere were well educated about sex. It would look like accepting that abstinence is not the only choice that young people are going to make - "I believe sex is supposed to be saved till marriage, however, if you choose to have sex before marriage, as many of you will, there are things that are very important for you to know" is a totally acceptable way to talk about your beliefs AND the facts of life with your kids.

You are NEVER going to get close to having a world where people don't have sex unless they are married. TRUST ME. That will never happen. You absolutely can work toward a realistic world where we take care of people, where we help and educate and love people in a way where the number of unwanted pregnancies declines drastically. Do you want a world where people aren't allowed to get abortions? Or do you want a world where people dont need to get abortions, where it's not even a question or an issue that they have to face, because they have been equipped with the tools to navigate sex and relationships and personal choices with maturity and safety and love? And look, I haven't even brought up the very very troubling issue of rape, incest, abuse. And real quick on that: you CANNOT make decisions like that for another person. YOU CANNOT DO THAT. A person who has been abused needs to have our support, our ear, our compassion, and if they need assistance or advice or comfort or a friend then we can be that. What we can't do is make a life altering decision for them after they have already experienced a traumatic life altering assault. We shouldn't be making those decisions for anyone (just like we shouldn't have the legal ability to tell anyone else whether or not to drink, or to pray, or to get circumcised).

There's so much more. So much. And it all needs to be said - not just said but talked about. But here's what I want to end this with: WE NEED YOU. We need each other. We have become so divided from each other, and so much of that is because we rely on our intermediaries: the media, the politicians, the social media algorithms. But we are never going to go anywhere unless we come together to figure this out. No matter what you believe this issue really is (a woman's issue, a moral issue), it is not JUST that. Left and Right. It is multifaceted, it is personal, and there are real people on both sides. And so I am saying to you my conservative christian pro-life friends: we need you. We need you to stop letting your politicians use you. We need you to BE THE BODY OF CHRIST to people. Not because we believe what you believe, but because we could use some very Christ-like people right now. Who challenge the powerful and who love people, not judge them, not further abuse them, not investigate them after they have miscarried a pregnancy.

We are never all going to believe the same things. But we do not have to be enemies, we do not have be opposed. I get that this sounds crazy, but we need to work together to build that world where people are loved and safe, where humans have freedom to make choices, and we have equipped them out of love and with love. Please work with us to make that world where women are not put in a position to need an abortion. Our women are amazing and powerful and inspiring, and if we could make a world where they are not always having to fight to be heard or respected or taken seriously, then I think we would all be blown away by what they could accomplish for the world.

Thanks for reading this. It was written out of respect and love and with an open heart. If you are reading this, it is because I love you. Thanks.

Two Weeks of Sunday Fundays

Last week I was out of commission as far as vlogging goes, as we were changing continents as well as moving houses, but here are two vlogs to catch you up:

our next vlog, coming out this week, will have our trip to Brazil, moving houses, and Sofia's first (full) day of preschool! 

We are all doing well, thank you! Jessica hated flying, and let everyone on the plane know it, but has actually settled in quite well (considering how much she doesn't like change). Sofia has told everyone she has forgotten Portuguese, but still responds to everything in both languages. Caid has his air conditioners!!!! And I really enjoy the feeling of getting things done--and moving/unpacking has been a challenge as well as quite rewarding. 

We had a lovely last week with family and friends, and then Mother's Day with my mom before we flew back to Brazil. I am a pre-griever (Caid is a right-as-it-happens griver, and I am not sure what the girls are yet--perhaps Jessie is a post-griever?) so most of my angst is dealt with before leaving happens, as my practical self then pops out and says, "Let's getter done." But as we flew into Recife and I saw around the area we live from the sky, my heart jumped once again, and I wondered anew at this amazing love that God put in me for this country. 

Especially as we deal with all this change in our life, I have felt God calling me to more responsible use of social media. For me it is a wonderful tool that I love, but parts of it can become just scrolling through, which often ends up wasteful. I am working on being more intentional and focusing on something special each day--and only using my regular social medial sites once a week (so if I don't respond right away, you know why: but text, email, messenger, and whatsapp are all still on). To help me remember, I am trying: 

Make-it-up Monday (catch-up day)

Taco Tuesday (fellowship with food day)

Worship Wednesday

Insta-Thursday

Facebook Friday

Snapchat Saturday 

I will let you know how it goes:)

Reads from the Interwebs:
1. Tear down a fence and build a bench
2. Hard goodbyes, sweet hellos: perfect timing for this one!
3. Tips for the tightrope of social media: inspiration for my above practicing of intentional days
4. Dear mom of littles...
5. 15 things I want to tell graduating third culture kids
6. Don't look down: an interesting perspective

May Sunday Funday

Our weekly vlog:

Last week was dentist trips for everyone, and this week is doctor visits, and we figured out (after having a male dentist and doctor) that Sofia loves all the female staff, and then shuts down around male staff (our Brazilian pediatrician is female). Luckily, they were kind men who waited for her to calm down and adjust (and sit in my lap the whole time). We also loved having my aunt and uncle visit for a week from California (that video will be coming soon).

A week from today (Monday) we drive to Chicago early in the morning (tickets out of Chicago were half the price they were through Indianapolis), then fly to Atlanta, then to Sao Paulo, and then to Recife. Hopefully, by lunch on Tuesday we will be almost home (we live about an hour from the Recife airport). It is a long trip for the little ladies, but we are ready and hoping for the best. Thank you so much for all your prayers, and know that next week's Sunday Funday will probably be a bit late:).

Reads from the Interwebs:
1. Sorry kids, it's not your best life: Yes. So well put.
2. The Enneagram type of the Avengers: confession time--Caid and I are super into superhero movies and shows:). 
3. What to know before you go: Super important! If I had time, I'd love to put together a list like this of things to know before you return as well! A great resource.

Two Weeks Sunday Funday

Our weekly vlog:

And we also did our first YouTube live, answering some questions we had been given:) It is NOT 5 minutes or less:

Two weeks guys. Two.

I always step into high gear two weeks before a big transition- finalizing and realistically cutting down my to-do list, trying to think of all the last minute stuff so it doesn’t catch me by surprise (but some things always do). Even my appetite changes.

We have done a good job with hitting all our main goals and living life well for this home assignment. We are excited and ready to return to Brazil.

But what they don’t tell you is that the better you do something- the more you open your heart- the greater the connections and love and vulnerability: the harder it is to leave.

My hardest goodbyes (from Brazil and the USA) are always after the sweetest times.

Not all goodbyes are hard. Sometimes you just know it is time. Sometimes God blesses with this unexpected peace about everything. But just because a goodbye is hard doesn’t mean it is bad. In fact, you could say that most hard goodbyes are because the time together was so good.

And so it is because right now is so good: squishing in time with friends and family and learning and growth...that it makes goodbyes harder.

Thank you for the hard goodbyes. 

Reads from the Interwebs: 

1. After Jim Elliot: I think it is so important to look back and realize anyone (ANYONE) that we have put up on a pedestal shouldn't be there--and if we can't find any faults, or think they are practically perfect, something is missing. And most of them would tell you the same thing (the ones that don't...watch out for them). I mean, just look at the Bible: lots of messed up people. The only one I can think of that wasn't was Daniel, and it makes me wonder sometime. He just seems too perfect sometimes. I know that I personally put way too many missionaries on a pedestal, and that just wasn't healthy. I think we should read--and hope my daughters will--about past missionaries and what God did through them, but I hope they are honest, open looks at all aspects of missionary life. 

2. The true Purpose of Home Assignment: almost done with ours!

3. On World Earth Day: so I missed that it was Earth day last week, but I have been increasingly convicted about how I treat nature and use resources the past couple of years: and I think it is a godly conviction as well as a practical one. I am not talking about feeling all guilty about global warming, I am talking about having a healthy perspective that God created the world, and it is a gift to be used wisely and carefully, not just for my convenience and gain. Unfortunately, I have seen many Christians take a stance that current American consumerism/packaging/way of life isn't something they need to look into and seek the Lord about, but that it is just something made up by the media. God help us all. 

4. Enneagram type and Anger: these articles always get me. And so far, they have always been right.

5. A distant look Back at Missions, part 2: Why (in the past) have missionaries left? So interesting. 

6. My most valuable, non-renewable asset 

Easter Sunday Funday

Our weekly vlog:

Our vlog about Easter will be out soon...it takes me a bit of a turn-around these days to get things posted. But, please check out this video about the Easter the kids at Living Stones had! 

Jesus is Risen Indeed! Last Wednesday we had a really great meeting at the Community Church of Greenwood, and had so many questions that later we will be doing a YouTube Live special, answering the rest of the questions about us, Living Stones, and missionary life. We had some dear friends come for the weekend, which was horribly rainy and yucky outside, but fun and warm at the various places we tramped about. Easter was so sunny and special with family and friends and Jesus. 

As the girls get older (especially Sofia), they understand more and more of what is going on: we have been coloring a picture for Lent every morning for the past month and a half, and it was so neat to see how Sofia could understand the Easter story so much better when it was given in small bite sized (coloring) pictures. We have also been preparing the girls for returning to Brazil, to which Sofia said "Oh! I will miss Grandma!" and it made my heart sank. But then she added, "And I will miss my mints!" (that Grandma gives her) And I thought that we might get through this heartache just fine:).

Reads from the Interwebs:

1. When you're sharing Jesus as an Outsider: YES! This makes so much sense! Things are changing in the USA, and while to me, as a missionary, it may even make it feel more like home--to many in the USA it is a scary time, because maybe, just maybe, you are being called to be more of a missionary yourself: "But we can no longer assume agreement about these things. Which means that even if you look the same and speak the same language and are living side by side with your middle class, white American neighbors, if you're a Christian, you are now a cross-cultural missionary. Effective evangelism in America requires that you understand a different worldview." (Is it bad that this makes a little happy?) 

2. What your pastor's sneakers say about their theology: This is a funny look at an important issue. The church of High End put it well: "I hope I would have the good sense never to take the job as a lead pastor where I am paid more than double the salary of the lowest paid full-time church worker. That means if I make $100,000 a year, the full-time church custodian ought to make at least $50,000. If I have benefits, she should too. Churches should set the bar on living wage for all staff." If we, the church, can't figure out this living wage stuff and make it work in real life, how can we (me, I definitely mean me) complain about the government/companies not doing it???

3. Money and missions: Do you have a plan for retirement? I posted this for me. Because no, no we do not. 

4. What it's like to travel when you have a "bad" passport: wow. How have I gone this long without realizing that for "others" the word is "Immigrant" while for me (aka American/European, probably white) the word is "expatriate"? It is important to read articles like this. 

5. Stories of Transracial adoptees: Guys! It is so true: I want to hear the good, happy stories where no one is bitter--100%! But we need to give space and listen to all the stories--even the not so happy...and even bitter ones--like about racism (see story #4, or adoptees, or LGBT pain..,) Redemption begins in telling and listening to stories. 

6. All the Easter Billboards: I love Easter--and took full advantage of two community Easter egg hunts to let my kids get tons of candy. And to visit churches we have never been to--with tons of people we don't know. I love all the open doors and hospitality of churches all over the city, and think that is how Christianity should always look. But, "It is much easier to welcome blurry, romanticized strangers on Easter Sunday than it is to welcome the darkest parts of each other in the weeks and years afterwards. Or, more succinctly: Relationships are hard. Grace is hard. Love-your-neighbor-as-yourself is so hard, especially when you don’t understand your neighbor, and when you’re not sure you even love yourself." 

7. Six R's of successful home assignment: Love this! Our goals, finishing in three weeks, are: 

"Rest

Recoup (family time, self care)

Report to our churches

Remember where we came from (enjoy American culture again)

Raise our support team

Return to the field as capable workers ready for another term of service"

8. Best morning routines for Enneagram types: This is fun (and true)

Sunday Funday April

Our weekly vlog:

Caid asked when we had free to get together with some friends and I scrolled through our calendar and said "April 29th. That's the last free night." It's down to that, my friends. Each week is filled with wonderful times, and during morning devotions I ask for grace to be able to enjoy and focus on each thing, without getting overwhelmed with all the other things around it. Many times I do, and sometimes I don't. Still working on it! Some highlights were Thursday morning prayer meeting at WRI and the encouragement we were given, and on Sunday Caid preached and I shared about Brazil and it was beauty and joy for our hearts. You can watch it yourself on a link I posted on Facebook!

Reads from the Interwebs:
1. One read that will change how you think about Immigration: “The child of immigrant parents is supposed to perch on a hyphen, taking only the dose of America he needs to advance in America.”
2. How setting a minimum viable day proved I'm not actually failing all the time: “I can do four things a day.” I said out loud to myself. “I can look after the kids, cook, clean the house, and homeschool. If anything else is added to my day one of those four things will not happen.”
3. Twenty Easter foods around the world: I enjoy things like this! It has Brazil eating Pasoca, which we do, but in my area we eat it all the time, not special for Easter. 
4. A letter to the grandparents of my third culture kid: This article had me sobbing in the bathroom--too close to home and change and all that--my word.